Trista's Barn at Bell Treasures
10 years ago
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Just Sitting
What seems to be one of the hardest things to do in dealing with a child with behavior problems is learning to sit and listen rather than to argue back. It is so hard to just sit and listen to your child say hurtful things long enough to let them know that you are not going to say things back. I used to argue back, I used to try to get her to stop saying things, now I sit and listen and really ignore what she is saying. When she sees that I am not going to say anything back she will go on and stop in just a little while and the next thing she does is be nice and say something like "Mama, will you help me with this" or something to that effect. It is hard to learn to do this, but with Cayle it has helped so much.
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i always have difficulty learning patience. you're doing a wonderful thing!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the follow on thebargainwoman.com
ReplyDeleteBless your heart! I can so relate. My son has Asperger's and can really spout off some hurtful remarks. I was relieved when I realized that about 3/4 of it was just dialogue that he had memorized from TV and that he didn't even have a clue as to what the meaning was. The other 1/4? Well, the best I can do is just remind myself that he really does not mean it and explain to him how hurtful his words are and try to help him imagine what he would feel if someone said the same to him. Basically, I am having to train him to be empathetic, as being aware of the feelings of others just doesn't come naturally to him.
ReplyDeleteI read about doing that somewhere or another.
ReplyDeleteI tried it with my stepson(who complains more than a woman) when he was younger.
He would complain, whine, etc...I would say, "hmmm" or "uh-huh" and he would usually stop his tirade a lot sooner than normal when I did this.
The problem is remembering to do it!
I'm your newest follower.
Have a great day.
P.S I think you & I are in competition for number of blogs. I have several on blogspot and 2 on wordpress!